Tuesday, March 23, 2010

How do you explain to your child that private parts are private?

Sentuhan Bayu: Since my eldest daughter is just 4 & still have no clue that boy genitals are different than hers, I can manage to ignore this question for now. But I know, sooner or later the question will haunt me. Anyway, that's the beauty of internet. I can learn from other mothers. ;-)

Teach them from small
We told them that besides mummy and daddy, no one else should touch you. We told them this from the time they started going to kindergarten. If anyone touches you in the wrong way, that's wrong. If they stroke your head and shake your hand that's fine. But anything from the neck down, that's wrong. They don't ask us why because they watch a lot of TV. We also talk to the kids about the rape cases and how dangerous it is. I feel that a lot of their questions are answered there. I think taking them to church regularly also helps so they know when something is done in the wrong manner because it's being dialogued in Sunday school. And if there's something they don't understand they'll come and ask us and we'll explain what the teacher meant. - Vivienne Ong, mother of a boy and girl aged nine and 15

No touching

I basically tell them that these are parts that people shouldn't touch and they shouldn't touch other people in those parts as well because these are private. Then I ask them to read the books on sex. I basically told them this before they went to school and they didn't ask me why. They also know they shouldn't see others in the toilet and others shouldn't see them either. - Cafflin Wee, mother of three girls and one boy aged seven to 16

Keep repeating

When my children were toddlers (around three) I started telling them that nobody is allowed to touch/see your private areas except mummy and daddy. This has been reinforced over the years. When they were younger and asked, “Why?” the simple answer for young children was “Because I said so.” As they grew older and were able to understand, the explanation became more complicated so we needed to explain with information which was age appropriate. - Adeline Lamond, mother of a boy and girl aged 11 and 13
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